Could anyone review the grammar and content of my personal essay?





.everyoneloves__top-leaderboard:empty,.everyoneloves__mid-leaderboard:empty{ margin-bottom:0;
}






up vote
-1
down vote

favorite












“You look like a criminal,” Radiya complained.
“Just do the job. Be on the lookout!”
I climbed on the ladder and start sticking a cardboard mailbox on the notice board.
“No intelligent life would dwell in the school corridor at 5 a.m,” he grumbled.



This… is why Batman works alone.



I smiled wide. “Then you and I might need to retake the IQ test.”



Radiya didn’t understand why I wouldn’t just ask permission from the teachers and do this legally.



HoO bOY.



I remember watching the tea went cold, as I sat on the meeting room with my presentation slides ready.
”Three minutes and I’ll explain why we should workout during breaks!”
Nobody came.
It happened again and again to the point where I realized that I just have to act.



Just do it.
—Nike.



“You’re losing your good name if they found out,” Radiya reasoned.



I turned at him.



“The only thing I’m losing is my time, waiting for unreasonable people who cover their ears on new ideas.”



I stapled the last piece of cut-out letter on the notice board
Tell us your problem. We are your friend



My ideas were never without calculation. I always consider mutual benefit. In this case, entertaining for the reader, life saving for the writer, because who doesn’t love drama?



Like my peers, I’m a teenager.
Young, hot and full of poor life choices.
Each path we take is critical to our future
.
When I lost my left vision, I broke. How am I an artist without my eye?



Yet, my mum came and guide me to the right path. A new mindset.



My peers might not be so lucky.
The school cannot afford a psychologist.
The school need this.



As I have predicted, my idea was well received. Students eagerly come to check anonymous’ problems. They wrote their comment and solution with the pen I provided.
Even the teachers joined.



I sort the mailbox weekly. From relationship problems to discovering domestic abuse cases and suicidal notes.



All these made listening to Radiya’s complaints in the early hours worthwhile.









share







New contributor




Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.


























    up vote
    -1
    down vote

    favorite












    “You look like a criminal,” Radiya complained.
    “Just do the job. Be on the lookout!”
    I climbed on the ladder and start sticking a cardboard mailbox on the notice board.
    “No intelligent life would dwell in the school corridor at 5 a.m,” he grumbled.



    This… is why Batman works alone.



    I smiled wide. “Then you and I might need to retake the IQ test.”



    Radiya didn’t understand why I wouldn’t just ask permission from the teachers and do this legally.



    HoO bOY.



    I remember watching the tea went cold, as I sat on the meeting room with my presentation slides ready.
    ”Three minutes and I’ll explain why we should workout during breaks!”
    Nobody came.
    It happened again and again to the point where I realized that I just have to act.



    Just do it.
    —Nike.



    “You’re losing your good name if they found out,” Radiya reasoned.



    I turned at him.



    “The only thing I’m losing is my time, waiting for unreasonable people who cover their ears on new ideas.”



    I stapled the last piece of cut-out letter on the notice board
    Tell us your problem. We are your friend



    My ideas were never without calculation. I always consider mutual benefit. In this case, entertaining for the reader, life saving for the writer, because who doesn’t love drama?



    Like my peers, I’m a teenager.
    Young, hot and full of poor life choices.
    Each path we take is critical to our future
    .
    When I lost my left vision, I broke. How am I an artist without my eye?



    Yet, my mum came and guide me to the right path. A new mindset.



    My peers might not be so lucky.
    The school cannot afford a psychologist.
    The school need this.



    As I have predicted, my idea was well received. Students eagerly come to check anonymous’ problems. They wrote their comment and solution with the pen I provided.
    Even the teachers joined.



    I sort the mailbox weekly. From relationship problems to discovering domestic abuse cases and suicidal notes.



    All these made listening to Radiya’s complaints in the early hours worthwhile.









    share







    New contributor




    Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
    Check out our Code of Conduct.






















      up vote
      -1
      down vote

      favorite









      up vote
      -1
      down vote

      favorite











      “You look like a criminal,” Radiya complained.
      “Just do the job. Be on the lookout!”
      I climbed on the ladder and start sticking a cardboard mailbox on the notice board.
      “No intelligent life would dwell in the school corridor at 5 a.m,” he grumbled.



      This… is why Batman works alone.



      I smiled wide. “Then you and I might need to retake the IQ test.”



      Radiya didn’t understand why I wouldn’t just ask permission from the teachers and do this legally.



      HoO bOY.



      I remember watching the tea went cold, as I sat on the meeting room with my presentation slides ready.
      ”Three minutes and I’ll explain why we should workout during breaks!”
      Nobody came.
      It happened again and again to the point where I realized that I just have to act.



      Just do it.
      —Nike.



      “You’re losing your good name if they found out,” Radiya reasoned.



      I turned at him.



      “The only thing I’m losing is my time, waiting for unreasonable people who cover their ears on new ideas.”



      I stapled the last piece of cut-out letter on the notice board
      Tell us your problem. We are your friend



      My ideas were never without calculation. I always consider mutual benefit. In this case, entertaining for the reader, life saving for the writer, because who doesn’t love drama?



      Like my peers, I’m a teenager.
      Young, hot and full of poor life choices.
      Each path we take is critical to our future
      .
      When I lost my left vision, I broke. How am I an artist without my eye?



      Yet, my mum came and guide me to the right path. A new mindset.



      My peers might not be so lucky.
      The school cannot afford a psychologist.
      The school need this.



      As I have predicted, my idea was well received. Students eagerly come to check anonymous’ problems. They wrote their comment and solution with the pen I provided.
      Even the teachers joined.



      I sort the mailbox weekly. From relationship problems to discovering domestic abuse cases and suicidal notes.



      All these made listening to Radiya’s complaints in the early hours worthwhile.









      share







      New contributor




      Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
      Check out our Code of Conduct.











      “You look like a criminal,” Radiya complained.
      “Just do the job. Be on the lookout!”
      I climbed on the ladder and start sticking a cardboard mailbox on the notice board.
      “No intelligent life would dwell in the school corridor at 5 a.m,” he grumbled.



      This… is why Batman works alone.



      I smiled wide. “Then you and I might need to retake the IQ test.”



      Radiya didn’t understand why I wouldn’t just ask permission from the teachers and do this legally.



      HoO bOY.



      I remember watching the tea went cold, as I sat on the meeting room with my presentation slides ready.
      ”Three minutes and I’ll explain why we should workout during breaks!”
      Nobody came.
      It happened again and again to the point where I realized that I just have to act.



      Just do it.
      —Nike.



      “You’re losing your good name if they found out,” Radiya reasoned.



      I turned at him.



      “The only thing I’m losing is my time, waiting for unreasonable people who cover their ears on new ideas.”



      I stapled the last piece of cut-out letter on the notice board
      Tell us your problem. We are your friend



      My ideas were never without calculation. I always consider mutual benefit. In this case, entertaining for the reader, life saving for the writer, because who doesn’t love drama?



      Like my peers, I’m a teenager.
      Young, hot and full of poor life choices.
      Each path we take is critical to our future
      .
      When I lost my left vision, I broke. How am I an artist without my eye?



      Yet, my mum came and guide me to the right path. A new mindset.



      My peers might not be so lucky.
      The school cannot afford a psychologist.
      The school need this.



      As I have predicted, my idea was well received. Students eagerly come to check anonymous’ problems. They wrote their comment and solution with the pen I provided.
      Even the teachers joined.



      I sort the mailbox weekly. From relationship problems to discovering domestic abuse cases and suicidal notes.



      All these made listening to Radiya’s complaints in the early hours worthwhile.







      grammar grammatical-structure





      share







      New contributor




      Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
      Check out our Code of Conduct.










      share







      New contributor




      Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
      Check out our Code of Conduct.








      share



      share






      New contributor




      Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
      Check out our Code of Conduct.









      asked 6 mins ago









      Wangcincay

      1




      1




      New contributor




      Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
      Check out our Code of Conduct.





      New contributor





      Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
      Check out our Code of Conduct.






      Wangcincay is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
      Check out our Code of Conduct.



























          active

          oldest

          votes











          Your Answer








          StackExchange.ready(function() {
          var channelOptions = {
          tags: "".split(" "),
          id: "97"
          };
          initTagRenderer("".split(" "), "".split(" "), channelOptions);

          StackExchange.using("externalEditor", function() {
          // Have to fire editor after snippets, if snippets enabled
          if (StackExchange.settings.snippets.snippetsEnabled) {
          StackExchange.using("snippets", function() {
          createEditor();
          });
          }
          else {
          createEditor();
          }
          });

          function createEditor() {
          StackExchange.prepareEditor({
          heartbeatType: 'answer',
          convertImagesToLinks: false,
          noModals: true,
          showLowRepImageUploadWarning: true,
          reputationToPostImages: null,
          bindNavPrevention: true,
          postfix: "",
          imageUploader: {
          brandingHtml: "Powered by u003ca class="icon-imgur-white" href="https://imgur.com/"u003eu003c/au003e",
          contentPolicyHtml: "User contributions licensed under u003ca href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/"u003ecc by-sa 3.0 with attribution requiredu003c/au003e u003ca href="https://stackoverflow.com/legal/content-policy"u003e(content policy)u003c/au003e",
          allowUrls: true
          },
          noCode: true, onDemand: true,
          discardSelector: ".discard-answer"
          ,immediatelyShowMarkdownHelp:true
          });


          }
          });






          Wangcincay is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.










           

          draft saved


          draft discarded


















          StackExchange.ready(
          function () {
          StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fenglish.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f474920%2fcould-anyone-review-the-grammar-and-content-of-my-personal-essay%23new-answer', 'question_page');
          }
          );

          Post as a guest















          Required, but never shown






























          active

          oldest

          votes













          active

          oldest

          votes









          active

          oldest

          votes






          active

          oldest

          votes








          Wangcincay is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.










           

          draft saved


          draft discarded


















          Wangcincay is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.













          Wangcincay is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.












          Wangcincay is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.















           


          draft saved


          draft discarded














          StackExchange.ready(
          function () {
          StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fenglish.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f474920%2fcould-anyone-review-the-grammar-and-content-of-my-personal-essay%23new-answer', 'question_page');
          }
          );

          Post as a guest















          Required, but never shown





















































          Required, but never shown














          Required, but never shown












          Required, but never shown







          Required, but never shown

































          Required, but never shown














          Required, but never shown












          Required, but never shown







          Required, but never shown







          Popular posts from this blog

          數位音樂下載

          When can things happen in Etherscan, such as the picture below?

          格利澤436b